Literally Sick

This will be a short post for Day 8 of NaBloPoMo 2016.

Why? Because I am literally sick and I blame it on the election. Okay…maybe I don’t…but still. I feel pretty terrible right now. I’m sure my nerves aren’t helping this sore throat and runny nose, even though the results still aren’t in. You know, the FINAL results.

It’s pretty hard to stay optimistic when my ability to give a damn has been medicinally suppressed but I won’t lose hope in my country. I’ll have to make the best out of it, no matter what the outcome.

I’m seriously debating on whether I should just sleep and pray I wake up in a better tomorrow. I still haven’t decided.

Anyway, that’s all for me today..I hope I feel better enough tomorrow to write something longer and with meaning. For now, I’m going to take more cough medicine and cross my fingers.

Good night, everyone and thanks for reading.


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Tomorrow’s the Day…

Election day that is.

As I sit here in front of my laptop, typing away at the keys, I can hear the news from my living room. The constant rattling of news anchors has filled my ears and brain with election buzz for what, 2 years (?) and by tomorrow’s end it will finally all be over. I can have a blissful sigh of relief after relentless talk of emails and tax returns and mudslinging left and right! Finally, the news channels will talk about news again and the world will be all the better for it because we all know it’s not just us Americans who were being affected by the presidential coverage this election year.  Right?


While I know this wishful thinking may not be totally realistic, I will be glad that the campaigning for both parties will be over. We seriously need a time limit for these things because I feel drained and left out to dehydrate in the sun like a piece of unwanted jerky due to the 24/7 news coverage. I was reduced to watching reality TV shows in my down time just for the sake of watching something that doesn’t make me want to scream into a pillow. (Unless it’s about the Kardashians. *shudder*)

I know I am not the only one who is frustrated with the way things were handled this year and for my fellow Americans who are as sick and tired as I am, I hope that tomorrow you go and vote for your chosen candidate. (Unless you voted early like I did.)

If you are undecided, think about who will bring about the change you want to see. We all have a voice, and by voting, we give life to that voice. One voice is loud, but a thousand voices is deafening.

It is one of our responsibilities as Americans to go out and vote, that is the entire purpose of our democracy. People have fought for the chance–the right to vote. We have gone through too much turmoil and circumstance as a country to be turned off from participating in this election. With that turmoil has been joy and pride..we are still capable of greater things.

I won’t tell you who to vote for. I’m nobody to persuade you.

Tomorrow is a day that will change the way we live in the US.

Don’t you want to be a part of it? 

(Easily find your polling place with this link)

Find Your Polling Place

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If I’m Being Honest…

Nov. 3: If you could be completely honest with no regrets, what would you say and to whom?

If I said I wanted to be honest with myself, would that be taking the easy way out?

I suppose it would…besides, even though I’m not always 100% honest with myself, it doesn’t mean I’m not aware of everything within myself.

If I could be completely would be to the one person who broke my heart.

I would tell them how their betrayal had affected me and scarred me as I grew up and lived my life feeling inadequate and unworthy. This toxic inferiority complex had reached its peak after I reached my 20’s and now that I am in grad school, I am trying to overcome these issues so I can live my best life.

I don’t know if I am ready for forgiveness.

I know I can’t forget.

But I know I’m not weak for fighting this fight this long..

Maybe I can even be honest with myself when I say that I am strong.

Prompt from

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Day 2: Being Brave

Nov. 2: When was the last time you did something brave? What happened?

When I think of bravery, I can’t think of anything I have done that contributes to that word. Being brave can mean so many different things from saving a person’s life to stepping on that creepy spider in the bathroom.

I guess it’s all in one’s perspective on what bravery really is.

Something that I have done that can be slightly considered brave is standing up for myself.

Being an only child, I grew up not really used to confrontation. I didn’t have to defend myself against siblings or bullies because I didn’t go through those experiences as a child. Not even when I was older in high school or college, things just generally went smooth and I minded my own business and got in no one’s way.

However, I have noticed that after starting graduate school, I have had to learn how to defend myself from other’s…comments.

My patience for these comments had begun to run thin and so once I finally decided to set things straight (albeit it wasn’t harsh) I felt better for doing it. It is possible to stand for my own honor without being rude or disrespectful. Just because someone goes down to that level doesn’t mean I have to follow suit.

I think it makes me better for it. Standing up for yourself is empowering and although it was a baby step, it made me feel good.


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NaBloPoMo Start!!

Okay, so as some of you may have noticed…I took the month of October off. Yep, I disappeared for that long even though it wasn’t my intention. SO what I am going to do to make up for that (for you readers and for myself) is to participate in NaBloPoMo this year. I tried it out last year for a few days and then it fell away like most things in my life.

Not this time!

I am going to be committed to write everyday. I need to prove to myself that I can do it. I can’t underestimate it like I did last year. I won’t lose!

Here is the prompt for Day 1 (which was yesterday so I’ll post twice today)

Nov. 1: When you’re having a bad day with your mental health, what do you do to help yourself?

This prompt is rather appropriate since I took a self-care day not too long ago. One of my issues is that I constantly doubt my self-worth and my capabilities and I am not afraid to admit it. No one is perfect; that’s an absolute truth.

When I am not feeling at my best, I like to keep myself in a gentle environment for as long as I can. I do things I enjoy and take it easy in terms of daily activities. Just because your body is capable of doing strenuous work, it doesn’t mean your mind and soul are up to the challenge. I like to light a candle for ambiance, open the shades of my window to see the trees and sunlight and put on some peaceful music (I prefer my Yoga Sanctuary playlist on Pandora).

Being comfortable is key for me. I unabashedly stay in my pajamas all day because:

  1. You don’t have to change clothes when you wake up
  2. They are COZY and COMFORTABLE

Also, I like to keep my diet as clean and as unprocessed as I can have it. Fruits, salads and lots of water help not only the soul but the body feel a little better too.

Oh, and maybe some dark chocolate here and there. 😉

Yoga and self-meditation are important, especially on those days where I am not my best. When I start getting into my darker thoughts, it’s always a battle to dig myself out of that self-deprecating hole. So by practicing yoga or just closing my eyes and thinking of good things, that takes some of that away. It doesn’t magically make things better, but at least by making it my choice to feel better, it is one step closer than if I wasn’t.

My faith helps me when even the sweetest smelling candle has gone out. After I pray, the sun always seems a bit brighter and my chest feels lighter so I can breathe easier. I think about the love that I have in my life and how lucky I am to have it.

Even if things are not working well for you right now, they do get better in time.

Lastly, don’t be afraid or ashamed to hide your emotions. We have them for a reason, to express our inner selves. I believe the best way to honor our own selves is to be as true to who we are and how we feel in the present. Cry if you need to cry. Hit that pillow and sure, go ahead and say that curse word if it will make you feel better.

That’s the endgame to all this, isn’t it?



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Celebrating An Offbeat Bluestocking’s 1st Birthday!

Technically WordPress considers it an anniversary but you know…any reason to celebrate!


Happy 1st Birthday to my blog-baby!

It is hard to realize that an entire year has passed by. The only way I can believe it is because I can look back to my older posts and see how much I have grown as a writer, a student, and a human being.

I tried to expand my creativity into other avenues and go beyond my comfort zone by joining groups like Poetry 101. I learned, I was challenged and best of all, I enjoyed it thoroughly.

I was at a low point when I started this blog. I had just about finished a year of doing nothing after graduating from college and was starting to feel that my bachelor’s degree was just an expensive wall decoration. I was rejected from a graduate program and took that year off mainly for self-pity. I felt like I had failed myself and my family; everything I worked hard for screeched to a halt with a resounding no. 

An Offbeat Bluestocking gave me something to do…it took my mind out of the harsh reality of my failure and self-loathing just enough to find pleasure in writing again. Sure, I had a fear of rejection again. ‘Maybe I suck at writing?’ ‘What if no one reads it?’ ‘What if no one likes it?’  But despite all that, I started it anyway. I wrote about my thoughts, wrote poems and ‘blurb’ narratives because in the end, this is my blog and I can write whatever I want.

I write what I want to read.

After this blog was started, slowly the pieces of my life were coming back together. I got accepted into another graduate program which now seems like a better fit. Who knows, maybe I will still reach my same endgame if I so choose.

One thing I did learn was that life is not a straight line from point A to point B. There are forks in the road and loop-de-loops and webbed lines that are tangled so close that you can’t be sure there is even a way out. But once you do finally make it, you see there is a way out. There always is.

Indeed, I’ve had some highs and lows this past year and having this small piece of electronic real estate has made me learn not only about myself but from others here as well.

These talented and beautiful writers are people I look up to and consider to be my friends.

Rosemawrites from A Reading Writer

You were the first person to connect with me after I joined WordPress and I just wanted to say thank you for reaching out and saying hello! I am so glad I was able to connect with a fellow millennial on this platform. Your writing and dedication to it is inspiring and I hope to not procrastinate so much so our shared love for writing (and reading) can grow! Thank you.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha from A Cooking Pot and Twisted Tales

Lovely Miss Jacqueline, I see you as a great inspiration and hope to write with as much passion as you do! Thank you for your friendship and feedback. You are always so encouraging. I read your wisdom in your writing and cannot help but feel enlightened with your words. Thank you.

Michelle Cook from Putting My Feet in the Dirt 

Michelle, what can I say that I haven’t already said? Your writing touches my soul in such a way that I feel like I know you although we never met. Our shared faith in God is something I appreciate because in the world we live in today, sometimes all we need is a little faith. Your feedback and messages always bring a smile upon my face and I look forward to many more! Thank you.

Christopher Couch from ClCouch123

Christopher, I want to say thank you for deeply insightful messages of feedback. Your writing makes me think, and I enjoy that! You are a kind and deep soul who writes about the important things going on in the world in such a beautiful and lyrical way that I wish everyone could read your poetry. I appreciate your words of wisdom and encouragement. Thank you.

Fico from Fico’s Gaming Mind

Fico, it has been a pleasure getting to know you through your writing. I enjoyed meeting a writer who shares gaming interests like I do! (although yours are at a higher level than mine, I’m sure.) We collaborated on a post together and shared a similar mindset about writing on the internet. I hope you continue to write because you find joy in it. For being my friend and fellow writer I say: Thank you.

To all of you, I want to tell you that you are all inspiring and gifted writers and people that are enlightening others through your writing. I know this because I am one of those so lucky to read your works. I hope that with this passing year our experiences here can continue to be positive ones!

Now for some closing thoughts:

I am looking forward to this new year of activity on An Offbeat Bluestocking! Not making any promises that I will post every day..I’m still getting the hang of balancing school with real life and writing. However, I am going to push myself to write more and to become more aware of inspiration in places I might not have seen before.

I hope to write more poetry and more therapeutic pieces that not only help myself but others as well. I can’t make plans for the entire year but I can plan for right now.

Right now it is time to enjoy life right as I’m living it.

Thank you everyone so much for reading this special birthday post!

(Here’s looking forward to the second birthday!)


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As I was talking with a friend yesterday, she told me that I was much more positive than I was before. Usually, I don’t associate the word ‘positive’ with my attitude. I’m no Negative Nancy but I liked to think that I was a realist.

Right after that comment she asked about how my classes were going. I thought to myself, ‘maybe the program is changing me?’ Could I have been changing throughout the Counseling program and not even know it? That must be it because it took someone else to notice a change before I recognized it within myself.

I find it interesting how such changes can be so covert, so deep in our subconscious, that we don’t even know we are changing until we are already changed. At least, it was unconscious for me because I know I wasn’t actively trying to change.

It’s a bit unnerving to think about however it is reassuring that positive changes can be so easy. My professors have always said that the program changes their students by helping them be more open, empathetic and understanding. I guess it helps with positivity too.

Well, if it is true that I’m more positive, then it means that one of my new year’s resolutions actually stuck throughout the year!

Whether changes happen through reframing by repetition or brainwashing (joking) then it really means anyone can change as long as they are open to it.

Anyway, this is as much writing as I can get in for now..I hope to update with something creative soon! Also…it’s almost time for the one year birthday of this blog! Something for that is in the works so stay tuned!

I hope you all have a lovely and safe weekend and see you in the next post!


I wanted to share an update of a special something I bought at the bookstore yesterday. Look at this beauty!


This is a lovely leather journal that was handmade in Italy. The pages are lined with raw cut edges and best of all it was on sale for 50% off..I had a coupon for 15% off so I got it for 65% off! It was around 12 US dollars which was a good deal after closer inspection of the quality of this journal. I couldn’t stop smelling it once I brought it home. That’s not weird right? I love the smell of leather and paper. The cover has gold accents and the spine has an antique book vibe.


I own so many other journals BUT they are mostly empty. I never know what to write in one because I want the contents to be worthy enough for such a beautiful vessel! I wouldn’t want to use it as a diary because I never know what to write about on a day to day basis. Maybe something more creative? If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know! I’m itching to start writing in it!


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