‘Fix her! Fix her!’
The loud exclamations ring in my ears.
My heart is broken and my eyes are blinded with tears.
I am not broken, only different. Why can’t you see that?
‘Fix her!’
Raised to speak my mind, but not to you.
‘Fix her!’
Raised to be strong, but not against you.
‘Fix her!’
Raised to be independant, but not from you.
If you wanted me different, then you shouldn’t have raised me to stand alone in a man’s world.
I can see the future, fragments of loud, searing pain. It tears away at my heart. Won’t you see? Won’t you listen?
You don’t want to understand, that is the pain that cuts deep. It stabs at me, over and over in the same place of my heart. The wound always open and bleeding as the years pass.
I am not broken, but wounded.
Bruised, but not shattered.
I am flawless in my imperfection.
The end has arrived in your eyes. My fate is reflected with rippling clarity.
I am trapped in the lunette of your judgement, the blade of the guillotine shreds through my soul. It is the finality of your rejection.
© 2015 An Offbeat Bluestocking
[Image via]
Be unique but conform to my expectations. What a terrible message. I think I grew up on the receiving end of that. But your voice here clarifies and crafts deeply and effectively the severity of reaction and turmoil from this oppressive agenda. Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, I suppose I’m just venting based on my own experiences.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, good venting that reaches to others, too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love the artistry that really shines through your work! I have nominated you for the Liebster Award! Here’s the link to the post explaining it: https://fullofjoyhappenings.wordpress.com/2015/12/02/the-liebster-award/
I look forward to reading what else you write!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much! I’ll get to work on making my post right away. Thanks again for the nomination!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Really great work, ClarissaG! I gotta say, this is the kind of stuff that gets me to come back here all the time. It feels like inner turmoil, doesn’t it? Trying to show the world, you; and you are labeled as broken. In many ways, people always thought I was broken, a crazy kid, and disconnected from reality. My family made me feel better; but society and the world is bigger than my family. Thankfully, I don’t care much about the outside world as much as I do about the people that accept me and care for me. Take care 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Fico. I guess this was all just suppressed inside for too long I just had to let it out in whatever way it would. It basically wrote itself, that’s why it doesn’t seem very structured; my thoughts rarely are. Anyway, thanks again.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hehehe. Thoughts are rarely structured as it is, it seems. At least writing them down gives you a chance to share them with the world, and also a chance to go over them again, and maybe fix a think here or there, to maybe make them a little more understandable. Us being people with deep feelings and emotions, which ourselves can’t understand that well, imagine when others come across them.
LikeLike
Pingback: The Liebster Award | An Offbeat Bluestocking